why do greek gods have to fuck up so much shit god damn just stay on your mountain and eat your fucking ambrosia and leave people alone
and stop having sex with things you are not supposed to have sex with
we’re all looking at you here zeus
Too bad Zeus didn’t think to invent condoms. Shoulda asked the Trojans.
You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train
i think my saddest moment as an Australian was finding out that the rest of the world doesn’t say “never eat soggy weetbix” to figure out the order of the compass
do u ever have that default username that you always use and if a site already has it taken youre like . speechless